Praying Steps 4 and 5 Of The Twelve Steps

 Yesterday we reflected on the first 3 steps of Alcoholics Anonymous and the very same principles in Psalm 34.  Well, as I thought about Steps 4 and 5 – what are some of the most “dreaded” aspects of this program my thoughts turned to Psalm 32 and these words:

Oh, what joy for those whose disobedience is forgiven, whose sin is put out of sight!  Yes, what joy for those whose record the Lord has cleared of guilt, whose lives are lived in complete honesty!  Psalm 32:1-2

When I refused to confess my sin, my body wasted away, and I groaned all day long. Day and night your hand of discipline was heavy on me. My strength evaporated like water in the summer heat.  Psalm 32:3-4

Finally, I confessed all my sins to you and stopped trying to hide my guilt. I said to myself, “I will confess my rebellion to the Lord.” And you forgave me! All my guilt is gone.  Psalm 32:5

In Step Four we are to make “a searching, fearless, and moral inventory of ourselves” and in Step Five “We confess to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs.” I mean, if we are being honest, in who of us doesn’t that set our heart quaking a bit?  We all know that we fail.  It doesn’t take going out on a repeat bender or hitting the streets as a substance dependent addict to tell us that.  It’s looking at not only what we’ve done but why we’ve done it and owning that we have some responsibility for it all. 

It’s so easy to blame others but to take a look at our own character defects and the impact our behaviours and attitudes have had on others – now that’s just hard.

And yet, over these many years of walking with people in recovery and hearing the Step 5 confession of quite a number of people, I can tell you that there are no other steps that bring the relief and uplift that completing these two steps does.  Why is that? 

Secrets are deadly and they fill us with shame.  When things are brought to the light we see them as they truly are.  They may be ugly but we find our humanity in the middle of it all.  We’re just like everyone else.  God says we are all sinners and so, while we need to do something about the sin, we are not different from others. 

For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God.  Romans 3:23

When we are sick and go to the doctor, describing our symptoms to him, he provides us with a diagnosis and a treatment plan. 

When we get honest, make a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves and confess it to God, ourselves, and someone else, God is able to show us the correct remedy for the malady that is causing the addictive thoughts and behaviours to be at work in us. 

It’s why we need to ask God to search our hearts rather than heading off on that journey on our own. 

Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my thoughts.  Point out anything in me that offends you, and lead me along the path of everlasting life.  Psalm 139:23-24

We are so glad, God, that You know more about us than we know about ourselves. You have all sorts of things that You want to share with us when we are able to receive from You.  You want to reveal to us those treasures stored up for us simply because You love us.  Help us to let You sort out what’s harmful in our lives so the wonderful things You’ve prepared for us can shine into and through our lives.

No eye has seen, no ear has heard, and no mind has imagined what God has prepared for those who love him.  But it was to us that God revealed these things by his Spirit. For his Spirit searches out everything and shows us God’s deep secrets. 1 Corinthians 2:9-10  

We are most truly ourselves when we live in loving relationship with You, our Heavenly Father, our Creator.  That’s how we were created to live.  Thank You for inviting us to live as “Beloved Ones” and to respond as people who know we are cherished and cared for.  We’ve live as unloved and unloving people in our character defects for too long.  We learned coping strategies to hide our fear of being hurt and let down.  Now today, as You invite us, God, we want to let go of those strategies and enter fully into a life of love and care.

Oh Lord, bring Your light into every corner of our hearts.  We know we don’t need to be afraid of Your light because You don’t want to harm us but rather to help us.  Whether we have one day or a lifetime of brokenness to acknowledge and confess, we remember that through Jesus Christ we have forgiveness and healing for every offense committed against us or by us. 

Thank You God for your promise to safely guide us on the right path that gives us joy and satisfaction.  Your heart today is to give us a life that is better than all we could ask for or even imagine.  We want to open our hearts and let You search us, confess completely what’s been going on, and allow new life from You to flow through us.  Amen