Wednesday, September 12, 2012 -- Wise Counselors (4)

Wise words bring many benefits, and hard work brings rewards. Fools think their own way is right, but the wise listen to others. Where there is no counsel, the people fall: but in the multitude of counselors there is safety. (Proverbs 12:14-15 NLT)

The founders of AA and the 12 Steps were well aware of these Biblical principles and so they structured the suggested program of recovery to include sponsors.  If we haven’t done so already, it’s probably time to prioritize building good counsel into our life. The following are some helpful considerations as we prayerfully look for this wise counsel. What are some of the qualities to look for in a sponsor, mentor, counselor, trusted confidante?

1. Does their walk match their talk?

2. Does he/she have a growing relationship with Jesus Christ? Do I see the character of Jesus in the person?

3. Does the person express the desire to help others on the road to recovery?  (Helping others find help versus trying to fix others)

4. Does he/she show compassion, care and hope but not pity?  (I don’t need someone who is simply going to feel sorry for me.)

5. Is the person a good listener?  (Does the person really care about what I have to say?)

6. Is he/she strong enough to confront my denial or procrastination?

7. Does the person offer suggestions?

8. Can the person share his/her own current struggles with others?(Openness, vulnerability, transparency)

Sponsors or mentors are not "know-it-all" people or magicians who have instant solutions to our problems situations.  They have experience from a journey of listening, learning, and putting into practice, those principles that God teaches make life work.  They are those who know that a humble stance before God, today, and every day, that pays attention to what the Holy Spirit is speaking, is the only condition in which true wisdom is anchored.

Then Jesus said, “Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest.  Take my yoke upon you. Let me teach you, because I am humble and gentle at heart, and you will find rest for your souls. (Matthew 11:28-29 NLT)