Monday, June 10, 2013 -- Making Amends In Relationship

What is making amends? What does that mean? To "make amends" for something you've done means you make up for, or compensate for, the injury, insult, infidelity, or aggression you have perpetrated. To make amends means that whatever we do, we must do it for the good of the harmed person, with a heart to lift them up and lighten their load. 

Fools make fun of guilt, but the godly acknowledge it and seek reconciliation (Proverbs 14:9 NLT)

Obviously we can never make up for how we’ve harmed others.  Only God can heal, but under God’s direction, empowered by His love and kindness, we can make a difference for healing and restoration in relationship where we’ve previously caused harm. 

Returning to someone we’ve hurt to make amends is a scary thing. The passing years, lack of communication, and memories of the anger and hateful emotional exchanges can all create tremendous anxiety. This was the case for Jacob returning to his homeland after many years to see Esau, his twin brother, a brother he had cheated and stolen from more than once. 

Now Jacob lifted his eyes and looked, and there, Esau was coming, and with him were four hundred men. ….Then he crossed over before them and bowed himself to the ground seven times, until he came near to his brother. But Esau ran to meet him, and embraced him, and fell on his neck and kissed him, and they wept. (Genesis 33:1; 3-4 NKJV)

Jacob’s tremendous fear that Esau was still seeking revenge gave way to relief when Esau received Jacob and was willing to have their relationship reconciled. The last time Jacob had seen Esau, he was in fear for his life, for his brother had threatened to kill him. With the passing of time, both of them had changed. Even though memories of pain might have been there, the goodness of generosity overcame the past brokenness. As we get ready to make amends it’s good for us to prepare our hearts to both give and receive gifts of goodwill and forgiveness.

©2013 Partners in Hope