Monday, June 3, 2013 -- Willing To Rebuild Relationships

Monday June 3, 2013

It's difficult to look at the harm we've done to others. For a long time we’ve lived life blaming others for the way they treated us rather than seeing or understanding how our behaviour was having an impact on those around us. The anger we felt towards those who mistreated us may have contributed to our learned behaviour and subsequent harmful treatment of others. However, our reactions to the offences against us are sometimes more deadly to our soul, and to the next person in line, than the initial actions or negative words of the person who harmed us. Regardless, it's important for us to recognize those we have harmed and become willing to make amends to all of them.

“You’re familiar with the command to the ancients, ‘Do not murder.’ I’m telling you that anyone who is so much as angry with a brother or sister is guilty of murder. Carelessly call a brother ‘idiot!’ and you just might find yourself hauled into court. Thoughtlessly yell ‘stupid!’ at a sister and you are on the brink of hellfire. The simple moral fact is that words kill. (Matthew 5:22-23 MSG)

God has a way forward for us. That way is rooted in forgiveness of others, and of ourselves, for all the harm done to us or caused by us. Those closest to us cannot escape being harmed by the consequences of our actions. If we are married, our addictions have a harmful effect on our spouses, even if we would rather not admit to that. God says that our lives are literally intertwined with the lives of those we are joined to in marriage. It may be a healthy union or a dysfunctional one. In either case, we’re united. The behavior of one always affects the other. Any time we fail to love sacrificially, or fail to show respect for our spouse, we are hurting them and ourselves. Sure, they may have hurt us too, but right now we’re dealing with our own issues and that’s what we acknowledge.

Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her. (Ephesians 5:21-22, 25)

Prayer: God, you know the pain in my heart as I review relationships, particularly of those close to me in my family. It's difficult to uncover and expose what happened, both what was done to me, and in turn, how I've allowed my reaction to that hurt to harm my relationships with others. I need your help. Please fill my heart with strength, healing, and comfort as I bring these memories before You and seek to make right what You show me needs to be addressed. Thank You Jesus that You are all I need and that you are shining the light of Your love into my heart right now filling me with peace. Amen