Twelve Steps Of A.a. Step Eight Acknowledging Broken Relationships (2)
Monday November 23, 2015
Step Eight – Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all.
Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother or sister has something against you, leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to them; then come and offer your gift. (Matthew 5:23-24 NIV)
The first part of Step Eight encourages us to admit the pain in our lives and relationships instead of running away from it. We hurt others because we are acting out of our own fear and pain. We need to take the time to acknowledge the pain in our life – pain caused by us and pain we feel because of the actions of others. We then write down what happened and clearly outline our part in each situation and accept responsibility for what we did. This is not an easy exercise because we expose not only our own actions, but also the actions of those who caused us pain to which we reacted imperfectly.
To become truly willing to make amends, we have to look for God in the middle of each circumstance or memory. We have to connect with this God who knows, who cares, who heals, and can even make something good out of the events of our past. We have to receive love and comfort and healing from God or we’ll never feel secure enough to forgive others or ourselves for failure to act in a loving way.
Dear friends, let us continue to love one another, for love comes from God. Anyone who loves is a child of God and knows God. But anyone who does not love does not know God, for God is love. If someone says, “I love God,” but hates a fellow believer, that person is a liar; for if we don’t love people we can see, how can we love God, whom we cannot see? (1 John 4:7-8, 20 NLT)
The second part of Step 8 is writing down the name of each person with whom we have had a painful relationship and owning our part in whatever happened. We must carefully examine our way of relating in order to know what actually feeds our addictive behaviour. When we humbly accept our inability to give and receive love, then we will begin to acknowledge the God who cares for us, and has pursued us with His unconditional love. God is the only one who can make changes in us that will keep us from running to cover our fear and pain.
But if we are living in the light, as God is in the light, then we have fellowship with each other, and the blood of Jesus, his Son, cleanses us from all sin ... (1 John 1:7 NLT)
©2015 Partners in Hope
More information on this and other related topics @ www.partnersinhope.ca/resources
Audio for Twelve Steps Of A.a. Step Eight Acknowledging Broken Relationships (2)
Recent Meditations
Giving Hope
Partners in Hope is supported wholly by our friends and community. We are thankful to everyone who partners with us to help bring hope to the discouraged, hurting, and hopeless.