Guilt And Unrealistic Expectations

Monday April 4, 2016

In recovery, many of us are plagued by a nagging sense of guilt when we make plans and, for various reasons, fail to achieve them.  We crawl into bed exhausted after a long day of work and frenzied attempts to accomplish everything on our “to do” list. We think thoughts like, “in spite of all I do, somehow it never seems to be enough”, and we live in guilt and discouragement. This misplaced guilt is the result of setting our expectations too high.

Was I fickle when I intended to do this? Or do I make my plans in a worldly manner so that in the same breath I say both “Yes, yes” and “No, no”?  (2 Corinthians 1:17 NIV)

Recovery is challenging and we need to drop any self-imposed unrealistic expectations of high achievement in favour of seeking God for the strength to accomplish those things necessary in any given day.  When we have not achieved all that we would like to, it would be more beneficial to our stability and well-being to thank God for those things that we did accomplish rather than fretting over our lack of achievement.  We need to remember Jesus' words to the people who asked Him, “What must we do to do the works God requires?” Jesus answered, “The work of God is this: to believe in the one He has sent” (John 6:28-29 NIV).

When we busy ourselves with activities that prop up our self-image or try to gain God’s favour, we are making an idol of our works.  Working to impress others is people pleasing and not God pleasing.  Our acceptance and God’s favour is achieved solely by our belief in Jesus’ death and resurrection for the forgiveness of our sins.  When we are born again to new life we are received into the Kingdom of God as His children.  When we come to God our Heavenly Father as His children, He will guide us in ways that will help us make efficient use of our time for our good and His glory. 

The Lord says, “I will guide you along the best pathway for your life.  I will advise you and watch over you.  (Psalm 32:8 NLT)

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