Twelve Steps Step Eight Acknowledging Broken Relationships (1)
Step Eight - Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all.
Step 8 is emotionally tough to deal with as it involves looking at the harm we have done to others. For a long time, we’ve lived life blaming others for the way they treated us. However, we have not been mindful of how our behaviour harmed others. Step 8 encourages us to make a list of those we know we have harmed and become willing to make amends to all of them.
“You’re familiar with the command to the ancients, ‘Do not murder.’ I’m telling you that anyone who is so much as angry with a brother or sister is guilty of murder. Carelessly call a brother ‘idiot!’ and you just might find yourself hauled into court. Thoughtlessly yell ‘stupid!’ at a sister and you are on the brink of hellfire. The simple moral fact is that words kill. (Matthew 5:22-23 MSG)
We often spend a lot of time and energy trying to change others and the way they are treating us. It’s time to accept the fact that we are powerless to change anyone but ourselves. Transformation in our lives will come when our words and actions conform to the principles contained in God's word. As we examine what we are saying and doing, God will reveal what is appropriate and what is not.
Do not say what is wrong in other people’s lives. Then other people will not say what is wrong in your life. Do not say someone is guilty. Then other people will not say you are guilty. Forgive other people and other people will forgive you. (Luke 6:37 NLV)
It's time to turn from the wounding and the blaming and look to God for His guidance. This is the foundation to a Step 8 list that prepares us to make amends.
Almighty God my heart and my ways are known to you alone. Help me identify those I have hurt by my words or actions in the past. Help me to become willing to make amends to them all.
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