Accepting responsibility for our behaviour is difficult for most of us even in recovery. It seems that when we have sustained past hurts, we tend to use the pain suffered to excuse our current bad behaviour. Because of the injustice that life brought our way, we expect our loved ones and others to tolerate our anger and mood swings. Often by the time we reach adulthood the victim role is well established. We are comfortable to continue in the same mode until challenged by emotional upheaval or a deteriorating life style. Peace and freedom are found when, as adults, we take responsibility for the choices we make, and for any subsequent outcome.
God says to each one of us, “Today I have given you the choice between life and death, between blessings and curses. Now I call on heaven and earth to witness the choice you make. Oh, that you would choose life, so that you and your descendants might live! You can make this choice by loving the Lord your God, obeying him, and committing yourself firmly to him. This is the key to your life.” (Deuteronomy 30:19-20 NLT)
In the Bible we read about King David who, after committing the sins of adultery and murder, took responsibility for his actions and said to the prophet Nathan, “I have sinned against the Lord.” Nathan replied, “Yes, but the Lord has forgiven you.” (2 Samuel 12:13 NLT)
Understanding, as King David did, that the sins we personally have committed, and the ones that have been committed against us, are offences against God will help us come to God and ask for forgiveness and healing. As we humbly accept forgiveness from our Heavenly Father for our own sins, we can then choose to forgive those who have sinned against us. We purposely turn the offences others have committed against us over to the Lord who is the righteous judge. When we do this, we free ourselves from the destructive power of bitterness. This is the start of taking responsibility for our own wellbeing and finding the peace of mind and heart we seek.
Prayer: Heavenly Father, Forgive me for my unwillingness to forgive those who have harmed me. Today, I choose to forgive them and accept that You are their righteous judge and I am not. AMEN
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