Letting go of defensiveness is one necessary adjustment we need to make in order to experience growth and success in our life with God in recovery.
It's hard to admit weakness or mistakes. We've spent so much time covering up those things with denial and substances that now it is a real challenge to hear truth and admit truth when there is something negative that needs to be faced. We feel insecure and we don’t have substances to cover up this painful emotion.
Guide me in your truth and teach me, for you are God my Savior, and my hope is in you all day long. (Psalm 25:5 NIV)
One of the first signs of being defensive is that we blame others or find excuses for what took place. Now and again there is a valid reason for the problem we face, but more likely than not our excuses come from a place of defensiveness. To sort out what’s really going on when we are defensive, we need to turn our attention to God and ask for His help to reveal what is true. Accusations from others are not necessarily any truer than our own fearful rationalizations. We want clarity and God wants to help us see what is right. When we see, then we can take the next right step.
When I felt my feet slipping, you came with your love and kept me steady and when I was burdened with worries, you comforted me and made me feel secure. (Psalm 94:18-19 CEV)
We can give ourselves permission to be a “work in progress” without ignoring the need to take corrective action. Our self-worth is not altered by whatever the situation is or by the criticism we are hearing. We need to listen well and maybe even get help to determine a truthful response, but these actions need to grow from a place of value for who we are rather than a desire to cover up a feeling of inferiority. In fact, when we come to a place of valuing ourselves as God values us, we will welcome the opportunity to make positive change rather than hiding in defensiveness.
Prayer: Heavenly Father, I want to live in the truth of who You say I am and what You know about the situations I am facing. Help me to turn to You when I feel defensive so You can comfort and guide me in the way I should go. Amen
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