Character Strength: Discretion

We are not always the best judge of which confidences shared with us need to be held or which need to be disclosed.  Most things shared in confidence need to be kept close to our hearts and shared only with our Heavenly Father as we pray for the good of the person who shared with us.  Some things are required by law to be disclosed to the appropriate authorities, particularly if a person’s life is in danger.  When a friend shares their character defects with us, although they may not have stated specifically they are sharing in confidence, we should use our discretion and keep that information to ourselves, leaving it up to our friend to disclose their shortcomings with whom they choose.

Discretion is a life-giving fountain to those who possess it, but discipline is wasted on fools.  From a wise mind comes wise speech; the words of the wise are persuasive.  (Proverbs 16:22-23 ERV)

We have not always behaved wisely with what we shared about others.  Often, we threw discretion to the wind in order to feed our own pride as “someone in the know.”  Sometimes when asked about another person, we set aside sound judgment and disclosed things which would have enabled others to use the information against them.

Who may worship in your sanctuary, Lord?  Who may enter your presence on your holy hill?  Those who lead blameless lives and do what is right, speaking the truth from sincere hearts.  Those who refuse to gossip or harm their neighbors or speak evil of their friends.  (Psalms 15:1-3 NLT)

We need to ask ourselves what our motivation is when we share things that we ought not to.  We need to think about the consequences of our actions and the harm we may cause.  To be kind to our neighbour, we need to be discreet in the way we speak about them and others.

Lord, guard my mouth.  Keep watch over the door of my lips.  (Psalm 141:3 NIRV)

Prayer: Heavenly Father, I ask You to help me have discretion in sharing what I know about others.  Forgive me for the harm I may have caused someone by my thoughtlessness.  Help me to be more like Jesus whose words strengthen and give life.  Amen

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