Wisdom For The Journey: Stop Arguing

Why do people argue?  Apparently there are lots of reasons. Sometimes we argue because we want our own way; or we want to hang on to things as we've known them; or we want the sense of power that comes from winning; or maybe we are simply arguing because we are tired or don't understand what the other person is trying to say.  Whatever the reason, when we find ourselves arguing, it's best to take a step back and think about what is going on.

It's one thing to respectfully debate a particular issue in a genuine search for truth.  We can question one another, and go back and forth with thoughts and facts that speak to both points of view on the topic in question.  However, when we move into that place where we are trying to get people to agree with us, or simply win the argument, then nothing very useful is going to come out of the discussion and we would do well to step away.   

We often say things in the heat of an argument that we wish we hadn’t.  The same is likely true of the other person in the argument and we need to offer grace and understanding to them.  Motivation speaker Wayne Dyer says it well: “Arguments drag out because one is too stubborn to forgive and the other is too proud to apologize.” 

Forgive someone, and you will strengthen your friendship. Keep reminding them, and you will destroy it.  (Proverbs 17:9 ERV)

Prayer:  Heavenly Father, help me to be a seeker of truth and reconciliation rather than simply wanting to win an argument.  Give me the strength and grace to respond with kindness and respect when a conversation gets divisive, and not be too proud to do what is right. Amen

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