Co-Dependency in Relationships

Contentment in life does not come from trying to control someone so they will meet our needs, or by trying to please them so they will like us and help us feel better about ourselves.  

We are living co-dependently when we look to those around us to affirm our value.  Others have a limited ability to understand us or provide for our needs.  The same limitation applies to us when we are dealing with others and trying to meet their needs.  God’s plan for us to have secure and satisfying relationships begins with us discovering the person God says we are – nothing more and nothing less.  

For we are God’s masterpiece.  He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things he planned for us long ago.  (Ephesians 2:10 NLT)

We need to let go of the impossible expectations we put on others.  People cannot love us enough or touch us deeply enough to satisfy the deep longings in our heart.  Only God can truly satisfy those longings.  We have our own desires and dreams and we need to let others have theirs.  We make our own mistakes and others make theirs.  We need to forgive ourselves and others and determine to learn from the mistakes that we all make.  

Even before he made the world, God loved us and chose us in Christ to be holy and without fault in his eyes.  God decided in advance to adopt us into his own family by bringing us to himself through Jesus Christ.  This is what he wanted to do, and it gave him great pleasure.  (Ephesians 1:4-5 NLT)

Fullness of life and freedom from co-dependency will come when we are rooted in a relationship with our Heavenly Father.  God made us in His image, and we have great value in His sight.  When we base our worth and identity on this truth, rather than on the opinion of others, we will begin to experience peace, freedom, and security.  

Prayer:  Gracious Father, I am forever grateful that I am loved and accepted by You.  Forgive me for being co-dependent with another rather than fully trusting in You.  I ask You to teach me how to live in a way that honours You and accepts others for who they are.  Amen